Mawwage

Welcome back to the Wicked Short ISBI, where last chapter Barb oversunned and underfed herself to death.  I thought about "Death By Hot Tub" but, in the end, it's not the hot tub that killed her.

"Oh Clyde, is it true?  Did the criminal warehouse really send over a pile of ashes that they think is your mother?"

"It's true, baby!  Now the only bad girl in the house is you!"

The devastation is palpable.

The house has gone to shit again.  No one does laundry.

Clyde doesn't care, so nothing gets done about it.

"I don't know if this car is safe to ride in."

I don't know how it's even running, what with the back tires embedded in the asphalt and all.

You go, Clyde!!

Ursula has her teen birthday. She got a party, not that you can tell.

She rolled "light sleeper".

"Not that anybody ever sleeps with all these ghosts, anyway."

True, there's ten of them now, including Chris and Georgie.  There's always at least one ghost, if not two, three or more, on the lot every night.

Let's do some school stalking, along with some family members that came to Ursula's party.

This is Jimmie, Bonnie and Ezekiel's son.

This is Felicia, Max's granddaughter.

Dewayne, son of 211 and my simself.

Leia, Jimmie's little sister.

Suzanne, also the offspring of 211 and my simself.

This is Howard, Fox's son.

Clyde got old!  Still can't let go of that hair can you, old man?

"It's all I have left of my youth."

Speaking of youth......

Who's this handsome devil?  Why it's Clyde!  I was really curious about what he would look like without that damn hair, so I took him into CAS, made him a YA again, and gave him different hair.  He's a hottie.

Thanks, Ursula!!

"Zzzzzzzzzz you're welcome zzzzzzzzzZ"

"It's my birthday!!"

Sure is.

"I'm gonna be torchholder!"

Yeah you are!

"It's my birthday, too!"

Nobody gives a shit, Chasity.  You only got a cake because Nefario was having a party anyway.

"I wish to get a LTW that literally makes the simgod LOL!"

*sigh*  I'm gonna be fighting that hair every birthday.

He rolled "artistic" for his trait, and "Home Design Hotshot" for his LTW.  Meaning that not only does he have to top the architect career, but he has to get 100 great reviews.

I have never gotten a single great review in the few times I have attempted this career/LTW.  Tell you what, if he gets even ONE  before this game is kaput, I'll consider it a job well done.

SO much better.

And some old chick.

"But....but.......I helped bring in the 9th generation!"

There there....

now shut up.

New torchholder, new spouse.  For the first time in awhile, it's easy.  Nefario is still best friends with Selena Swain-Bayless.

Oh yeah, she's a Bayless alright.  Check out those eyes.  She must be a Bayless on her father's side, since on her mother's side.....

That's right, Buck is her great-grandfather!  I never checked her family tree.  I figured with no Amadeus in her last name that she was safe.  Clearly not. Oh well, pressing on.

Nefario invited Selena over so we could age her up and move her in.

"Hey, Selena!  Look, you and I have been best friends since we were kids and ........ well ........... now that we're both grown ups and everything, I was wondering if ..... uh .....

"..... you'd like to ...... um ...... take this ...... uh .......... our relationship .........to the ........ uh .........next level?"

Brilliant sweetie!  Well done!

Of course she does!

"Who's the man??"

You are, sweetie.

Here's the new girl.  Last spouse of the ISBI.

Nothing like getting busy in your dead grandmother's bed.

"Hey, this bed is overdue for some action!"

You're overdue for some action.

"True."

Prince of Pickleburp:  "Hold on, kids, let me get comfortable!"

Aw, they are cute.

New generation, new house!

They are still in Riverview.  This is the last house, so you're mad scrolling sitting through the tour.

Of course when I added Barb's grave it disappeared!  It's supposed to be to the left of the left gray boulder.  Dammit!  I'm assuming it's still there and am hoping it will show back up like Venus and George's graves did at Oz's house.

I wanted a basement with a glass walled pool, so the "office" is below the outdoor party area.  There are two computers and another bathroom.  No big.  I think it looks cool.

Selena is the first to give the pool a try.

"Are you sure that weird, metal fish isn't going to eat me?"

It's funny, when she swims over to the ladder to get out, she momentarily disappears from the pool, only to reappear climbing the ladder.  This only happens from the basement view.  When I watch her (she was diving) from above she never disappears.

New torchholder, in all his glory.

Nefario spends most of his free time painting.  He needs a supply of ready made paintings for when he starts his job, plus it counts as "working".  Which will be really nice when the babies start coming and he has to stay home.

Ursula spends her time staying up all night in the hot tub and sleeping through school in the morning.

Moo: "We meet again, my child, in the barren wasteland we now call home."

Karl:  "Whatever, Mom.  I've got a fire pole to investigate."

Moo: "You know, Karl, you COULD be cool and play along for a little bit.  I'm just trying to spice up our afterlives, an eternity stuck in our descendants' backyards."

Karl: "Forget the backyard, they've moved the good stuff into the house!!"

"This is SO RAD!!"

I had initially placed the pole in Nefario and Selena's room.  I thought I could lock their door and it would be a fun way for them to get from their room to the first floor.

That brilliant plan lasted only a few hours, as Karl demonstrated that sims can and will shimmy UP the pole.  So I had a backlog of family coming up the pole into Nefario's room, and then bitching and moaning because they couldn't get out the door, then bitching and moaning over the line for the pole. So yeah, that thing got moved into the hallway right quick. They love it.  Everyone uses it about as much as they use the stairs, if not more.

"I'm an innovator!!"

DAMMIT, KARL!!

"Um, I think this porta-potty needs to be cleaned.  The methane is leaking out.......and has kind of a purple color."

Feel free, Clyde.  Tell Genghis Khan we all say "hello".

"Help!!  They're after me!!  Can't ................ escape!"

"NOOOOOOO!!!  I'm ................ being ............... sucked ....................... back ................. to the past!!"

"Oh thank god!!  That was a close one, I think my mind powers helped me defeat it.  This thing should really come with a warning label."

After a round of chimeless "try for baby" woohoo, an exhausted Selena actually got up from her bed and went to sleep in one of the single beds.

"Zzzzzzzz not married zzzzzzzzzzz can't share bed with boyfriend zzzzzzzzzZ"

It's all I got.  No one else can get into Nefario's room, if they'd even share a bed with him, so last one to decide they are tired is a rotten egg.

I knew I put those +++ loveseats out by the pool for a reason.

MVP gives himself a EA default new look.  I don't like it.

"Puppy no ask you."

Look who offered Nefario a job!

"Don't worry, Auntie!!  I've got a vision for your powder room, and it's going to be beautiful!!"

"I've seen your house, so I'm not so sure.  But still, I promised your father."

Totes stylish, yes?  Do you like the original artwork?  The painting, not the pool sign.  Although you never know who may want to swim in the toilet.

"Um, kid?  About this painting, I think you missed a spot.  See?  Right there in the middle?"

A true artist, always misunderstood by the homogenous masses.

"So, okay, it's not bad.  I mean, it's got a toilet, sink, shower, and all that.  We don't have a pool, but maybe the sign will help with any cats that get in the toilet. And I am a cheap ass, so I appreciate you not bleeding me dry. It's not great or anything, but I can live with it."

"*sigh*  Clearly my brilliance is lost on ALL the family."

Vag lives with her daughter, Leila, who just had a baby.  Vag is a grandma!!

"Do you think if I put it out by the curb, someone will take it?"

Barb wishes she'd thought of that.

BTW, Leila's baby daddy is Max's grandson.  Oh yeah.  At this point truly marrying outside the family is the exception rather than the rule.  It just gives you the warm fuzzies, doesn't it?

Anyway ......

It's like The Sims version of the "participation trophy".

I put it in the hot tub/laundry room, where everyone can admire it.  Or not, if they face the other way.

"I love my knee.  I think it's my best feature."

Selena gets out of the dumpster behind the military base long enough to pop.  FINALLY.  It took 4 different attempts to hear the chime.  I'm thinking the game doesn't want to let go.

"Why doesn't this corner go anywhere?"

"Hello??  I want to get to the pole!  How come I can't walk through the wall?  How the hell do I get out of here?"

It's SO stupid.  I liked the triangular-ish nursery.  But apparently sims are so stupid that the corner interferes with their routing to the pole.  Everyone who gets stuck there is trying to get to the pole.  And I've seen animals in this game back up a hundred times, but now that I think of it, I don't think I've ever seen a single sim go backwards.  So they can't go forward, apparently they don't have the required acreage to go to the side, and they are too evolution-challenged to back up.  So they stand there and bitch while their needs drop.

You idiots are why we can't have anything different.

"Way to go, son!  I'm so glad you inherited your dad's impressive features."

"Dad!!  Get out!!  What are you doing?"

"Oh relax, I'm just admiring the kleenex box on the sink!  It's a work of art!"

"No wonder my sense of style is a mystery to these people."

I miss Barb.  Her ghost hasn't shown at all.  She better not be gone for good!

Okay, we'll throw a party.  It's my last chance, might as well.

So I have two of these giant boulders in the yard.  I'm only just now realizing that they have pictographs on them.  I haz the observant.

"Boy I'm getting tired of swimming.  I think I'll go sit down."

Um, Clyde?

"What?"

Nothing.

"Wooooah, I feel kinda funny.  Everything looks so .......... warped!"

"Is there hippy water in this pool?"

Yeah, that's it.  Hippy water.

I need to get more eye-rolling memes.  I'm overworking poor Hermione, here.  She'll have no time for her schoolwork, and we all know how well that goes.

Ursula grows up.

She is now evil, and wants to quit a lot of jobs as a Jack of All Trades.  She moved out into......

Barb's old house, which is right next door.  Poor girl, I'm going to be spying on her all the time.

"Okay, I was told that being the spare meant getting kicked out and ignored.  That's the deal.  I did not sign on for anything different!"

Aw, it's cute how they think they have a say.

Selena agrees to officially join the insanity.

It's party time!  The wedding is the next day since I want to have it before the baby comes. I went all out, can't you tell?

Our first wedding cake!  Check that shit out!  Let's get the party started!

It took some doing to get Selena under the tent and anywhere near where I wanted her.

"I, Selena, do take you, Nefario, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, in successful navigation and routing failure, until Grim parts us."

"I, Nefario, do take you, Selena, to have my babies, make some money, and maybe even do a load of laundry once in awhile, until Grim does his thing."

Run, Selena!  It's a trap!  You'll serve your purpose by squirting out babies, and then I'll ignore you until you die.

*gross kissing noises*

I don't think she cares.

Nothing like a good wedding to bring all the relatives out of the woodwork.

"Hmmmm, I hope I'm doing this right."

"My husband is such a big, strong man!  He's cutting that cake like a champion."

Fox: "Jesus, kid, you are new aren't you?"

"Got it!!  No ... wait ... that's the table.  Crap!"

2 enjoyed the party in his own way.

"I do love a good party.  Especially a party with a hot tub.  And my foot.  I love my foot."

The party ends just in time!

Nefario:  "Oh shit, what do I do?  Boil water?  Get towels?  Pee into the wind?"

We're in the home stretch!  Next, birth, death, and Georgie isn't the only red ghost.

Torchholders: 9

LTW: 4
Children: 27
Social Worker Visits: 0
Accidental/Total Deaths: 1/17
Pass Outs: 11
Pee fails: 14
Fires: 3
Fights: 0  
Reach top of career: 1
$100,000: 4